don't yawn, or i'll be offended

i need a nap.

the easily entertained "nascar stars of tomorrow" finished driving around in circles after midnight, and i had to be back at work less than six hours later. add to that equation the "weekend" drink i consumed last night- not what you think- and i'm struggling this morning. (i don't drink caffiene very often, so when i do, it tends to keep me awake, which is why it took me an hour to drift off after i got home last night. nothing quite like the frustration of tossing and turning and trying to get comfortable when you only have a five hour window during which to sleep. ugh.)

when i came home around 12:30, the guys across the hall were hard at it- fortunately the cops didn't beat down their door at 4 a.m., as they did during the "housewarming" bash a couple of weeks after they moved in. they were still partying when i left this morning at a quarter till 6. i'm quite certain i'll be tripping over their customary bag of mostly empty cans later on today.

these neighbors are just the latest in a string of winners. when i lived catacorner to my current abode, the girl next door (whose apartment is now across the hall from me) was nothing if not popular. the girl who used to lived beneath her and i used to ponder how it was that no two of her suitors ever ran into each other.......furthermore, we were quite amazed that she (to our knowledge) never called out the wrong name. i think she moved on after bedding most of columbia. i was more than glad to see it- there were a few times that i was convinced her headboard was going to crash through our common wall and wind up in my bedroom- at 2 a.m.

eeek.

the couple that replaced betty boom-boom were young and apparantly not too bright. the female drive various sports cars and always had a cellphone attached to her ear, despite showing no signs of having an actual job. (my bets are on "dancing", personally.) her companion didn't seem to be the sharpest pencil in the drawer. it's hard to forget the day i came home on my lunch break and walked past this goober, who was chatting away on his cellphone about how he couldn't believe he'd managed to rip off his driver's side door while backing out of a parking space. (i did not stop to ask how this was possible, though i was certainly tempted.) since the guy was practically in tears, i assume it was something of a big deal to him. as they say on my favorite ebaum's world animation- "eeeeediot". when i came home on my lunch break about a month later, the same guy was stabding on his balcony, looking at the side of the building. when i walked by, he asked if i saw any gravel on the building. since this wasn't exactly a normal place for gravel to be, i asked him why. his reply: "well, they told me i couldn't clean my fish tank by dumping it out the window anymore, but i accidentally forgot."

wow.

plus, they had their loudest friends over each weekend- both friday and saturday nights. so, you can imagine my excitement when i learned they'd moved out. i considered inviting a bnch of friends over and throwing a party, but the next tenants beat me to it. in fact, they threw such a party that i was awakened at 4 a.m. on a saturday by the sound of loud banging. (not the kind my former neighbor practiced- this was something more serious.) when i looked out the peephole, there were several men in uniform. since i was not yet fully awake, my first thought was "crap- my undeclared canadian potato chips and prescription drugs have finally caught up to me." however, once my contacts settled into place and my eyes were able to fully open, i realized the officers were knocking in the door across the hall. fabulous! i was off the hook once again! from what i can gather, the guys across the hall were partying too hard, a fight broke out, and one of them took off running. i'm not sure who called the police, but when they came, everyone was too......compromised to open the door, so it had to be knocked down.

once again, wow.

i'm pleased to report that both of my recent cd purchases have appeared in my mailbox. the duran duran tribute album showed up thursday (the combination of goldfinger covering "rio" and reel big fish's cover of "hungry like the wolf" made it worth every bit of the $25 or so dollars i shelled out for it.), followed by my eagerly awaited o-zone disc yesterday. i haven't listened to it yet (no cd player in the car, and 1 a.m. just wasn't the time to be playing it at home), but both it and my discman are packed for the drive to the upstate later on today......

......before which i will need a nap.

(i've tried to fix my spacing four times now, and it's become a case of "either give up, or throw the monitor across the room", so forgive me if things aren't broken uup into the nice, neat paragraphs i'd originally intended. it's not my fault- really.)