Thursday, August 11, 2005

i salute you!

you know those budweiser commercials saluting real men of genius?

i've got a candidate:

mr. runs across the street after 10 pm wearing nothing but navy blue but figures no one will hit him because, after all, he's not wearing black death-defier.

maybe i got a little carried away there. however, i doubt i'm alone on this one.

the road in question: 4 lanes, speed limit of 45 mph
stoplight? yep. less than a block away in either direction.
the time? 10:15 pm

i was heading home from a long day of work/babysitting/deliveries when this genius wearing a navy blue outfit started to run across the road to the local gas station in front of my freaking car which is flying down the road with the greatest of ease at about 50 miles per hour. as i applied my brakes- hard- my would-be hood ornament wisely decided that maybe he should hold off on crossing that last lane of traffic that stood between him and his (smokes? lottery ticket? high-quality bathroom dispenser condom? who knows?) necessities for another minute or two. brilliant! then, i'm sure he wondered why the little white girl in the car was giving him a dirty look as she reaccelerrated. (i neither know nor caregive a rat's ass whether or not that is spelled correctly. like i said, it's been a long day.)

so, here's to you, mister. next time, i'll speed up, but this time, you'll just have to settle for the one-finger salute.

6 comments:

D said...

proof that there needs to be more chlorine in the gene pool.

Joe said...

This blog sucks. Where are the Amanda Peet foot soles I was expecting to find?

D said...

digi-lol

Ren said...

They were condoms. And I'm sorry. A man's got to do what a man's got to do to go do a woman.
Wait... You're not talking about Waynesboro, PA, are you? Hehehehe. My mistake.

bricotrout said...

i have long been an advocate of the city (any city, ALL cities) investing the funds in quadrupling the amount of high quality condom dispensers in various locations. bus stops, tennis courts, post offices, day cares, assisted living centers.
the amount of 'my baby's daddys' and pedestrian accidents would be cut by a 10th in this country. and those are not numbers we can ignore!

duff said...

bricotrout: this calls for a petition.