Monday, May 30, 2005

what the......?

as i mentioned before, i'm working at the radio station on my day off from school. one of the perks of working at the station is that there's always at least one newspaper lying around for my convenience.

so, i set down my bag (weighed down with more magazines for my uncluttering effort), hooked up the headphones, popped in my tape, and opened up the latest edition of the state.

now, i'd heard rumors before about this, but i'm afraid inxs may have gone off the deep end. (actually, i'm tempted to say "sold out".)

it seems my favorite band in the whole wide world (since the tender age of 8, when i first heard "need you tonight") has decided that, nearly eight years after michael hutchence's death, they need to find a permanent lead singer.

terence trent d'arby didn't work out, which is a pity- that could have been interesting. (somewhere in all this, he decided to change his name.) jimmy barnes (who joined inxs on a tune for the soundrack to the lost boys, "good times", in 1987) didn't work out. even jon stevens (who was declared a permanent replacement.....then left a year later) only hung in there for one single.

what's a band to do?

obviously, the only option is to join the three-ring circus that is reality television.

when i first heard the rumors about this, i thought the show would be some spawn of american idol. (no link- i can't stand american idol- even when celebrities i like are guest judges.)

i was close- i think.

the premiere of "rock star:inxs" will light up tv screens around the nation on monday, 11 july. (i'm mildly curious, but i doubt i'll watch it.) the show will be hosted by dave navarro (of jane's addiction and red hot chili peppers fame- and the guy who gets to see carmen electra naked any time he wishes) and brooke burke (who i believe is involved with/married to someone famous, but quite frankly, i don't care enough to look it up). it will begin with fifteen contestants, and each week one of them will be eliminated after some sort of "performance competition".

but wait- there's more!

not only will the contestants perform onstage on a weekly basis a la american idol, but they will also live together in a hollywood hills home! (hmmm......where have we seen this before? real world? big brother? surreal life? why not stick them all on an island and have the judges (the other 5 members of inxs, i assume) float in on a cruise ship and dock on the island for the weekly performances? i can see the "challenges" now:

~get helena christensen to look in your direction
~write a hit song about kylie minogue
~take up with bob geldof's wife (oh, wait a minute.......)

(quite frankly, i'll never understand how that last one happened anyway. i mean, she was more than a little odd.......)

even better- mark burnett plans on milking this for all it is worth- which apparently is three episodes a week.


in other inxs news, it seems michael's daughter, who is now eight years old, is recording a rap single and has plans to release an album. so- will she go by her full name- heavenly hiraani tiger lily- or will she stick with her daddy's nickname for her? (as i recall, he called her "tiger".)

ok- on with my shift.

calls from overzealous "fan" so far today: one
number of strange jokes told during phone call: one


Digitalicat said...

It's times like this I wish I watched more television. Then my quiet boycott of this show would actually carry some meaning.

Are you taking applications for overzealous fan #2?

duff said...

make that three calls from my overzealous fan so far. perhaps if i have time after my shift, i'll put up an audio clip of this HILARIOUS joke he told me.


sure, digitalicat, you can apply to be long as you promise not to be quite so creepy.

Larry said...

Wait, Bob Geldof's wife is weird. Didn't MH die of asphyciation(SP?) in some rather promiscuous way. That to me is weird.

Also, I would think you would have to be a little on the odd side to marry a man who played "Pink Floyd" in the wall(he is very creepy in that one).

terence trent d'arby, really?

again i must apologize, for those calls. I get really bored at work and the steering wheel has become a bit of a bore.

Kal said...

Yes, the INXS thing is kind of sad...

But don't tell me you won't be watching NBC's Hit Me Baby One More Time.

Each week five 80's-90's one-hit-wonders will perform their "signature" song and one current hit and a winner will be chosen by the audience.

Up this Thursday: Arrested Development, CeCe Peniston (who?), A Flock of Seagulls (cool), Loverboy, and Tiffany (isn't she doing soft-core porn on Cinemax?).

In coming weeks they'll have Tommy Tutone, the Knack, Wang Chung (omigod heavy-duty junior high school dance flashback just now), and, in what will surely be the comedic highlight of the whole summer, Vanilla Ice ("Alright Stop, Collaborate, and Listen...")

Shoot, this could end up the best reality show evah...

(That evah in honor of Boston Rob..)

(Who's now sold out to be St. Petersburg Rob. What a wussy. Shoveling to much for you, Robbie?)

Mossy Stone said...

Maybe it's just me, but shouldn't these guys (INXS, not your fave fan) be getting the message that it's time to hang it up?

It's pretty rare for a band to lose a front-man and still keep going with any measure of success.

Turning yourself into a television trivia punch-line seems like a sad end to a good band.

Just my $0.02

sojourning crow said...

um....."and in other news..duff's head has exploded over the southern tip of South Carolina..
it seems the INXS zealot intern/student was reading about a possible line-up change in the band and spontaneously combusted in the breakroom. details, along with mckauley culkin's active career, are SKETCHY at this time, but we do have these pictures of the damage to local yogurt bars...Back to you, Cathy..."

duff said...

larry: it's been a long time since i last read the book on the subject (the title of which i am too lazy to look up right now), but michael hutchence had a crappy night. the band was about to embark on their 20th anniversary tour and he wanted to spend some time with paula and their daughter, as well as tiger's half sisters, all three of whom has odd names. (something involving "fifi", "peaches", "trixibelle" and a few other very unconventional combinations.) bob geldof said, "no". most of the other details escape me, but i recall wondering at the time why tiger and pauls couldn't come down by themselves. anyway, michael became quite upset, and the combination of prozac, booze, and a few other chemicals (i believe cocaine was involved, too) really didn't help matters any.

did he decide to get kinky and went a little too far? not sure- after all, this was the guy who reportedly got it on one row away from the prime minister while on an airplane. (again, details are a little fuzzy- one of these days i'll have to dig out the book and reread it.)

was michael suicidal? well, bono disputed that theory at the time, saying that after kurt cobain offed himself, he and michael had a long, serious discussion about how stupid suicide was.

but, again, michael had enough chemicals in his system to fuel a small rave.

the irony of the whole situation is that when paula killed herself a couple years later, custody of their child went not to michael's family, but to bob geldof.

as for "your" phone calls- could you do me a favor and quit calling and telling me how much my voice/musical choices "excite" you, complete with sound effects? it got old after....well, halfway through the first time.

kal: thursday nights on nbc? i am so there!

wasn't wang chung a two hit wonder, though? they had "everybody have fun tonight" and "dance hall days". (in my opinion, the latter was superior to the former, but that's probably just me.)

and tiffany may be putting in screen time on skinamax, but debbie gibson (who i preferred in that particular matchup, no matter what teen beat's opinion at the time) apparently shed it all for playboy recently.

mossy stone: i could not possibly agree more. to be perfectly honest, up to about six months ago, when i first heard murmurs about this "rock star" abomination, i thought they'd finally packed it in.after all, they should still be making decent money off of the sales of their old albums. heck, i've bought "kick" twice on tape (wore the first one out) and at least three times on cd (scratched on, got nail polish on another), and i know several other folks with at least one or two of their cds lying around.

sojourning crow: i wasn't blogging from the breakroom- i was in the studio, so i would probably have wiped out at least one radio station. everything else sounds about right, though.

whew. time for bed.