Saturday, May 20, 2006

over the swamp and through the woods

despite the late night last night (not what you think- i haven't been out carousing and dancing on tables in ages), i found myself wide awake at approximately 5:35 this morning- roughly the same time i walked past a mirror in a well-lit bathroom and saw my thighs.

lest you think (fear?) this will turn into one of those typical female body issues posts, let me state for the record that i really don't have any major body issues. granted, i think i could probably stand to lose 5-10 pounds (but who doesn't?) and the cellulite reality check this morning was an awakening of the rudest sort, but overall, i really don't worry about it that much.*

that said, something has to be done, lest i send small children (as well as val kilmer) running screaming in the other direction the next time i hit the beach in a bikini.

i really need to start working out......and while i'm at it, i'll be slathering on thigh cream for good measure. i figure one or the other has to work at least a little. i mean, i look pretty decent in jeans, but once out of them, i'm afraid i don't quite resemble a lingerie model.....though with a little creative airbrushing i suppose i'd have a shot.

so, with that in mind, after work today, SO** (who also admits he could stand to lose a few) and i will boogie across town and spend an hour or two hiking amongst these:



he's never been to congaree national park, and i haven't been nearly as far along the trails as i'd like. i figure this way, we'll be hiking somewhere slightly more interesting than the workout room at the apartment complex, and it's a lot harder to give up exercise in favor of a nap at the park than it is at home. (though there are several conveniently placed benches in the park, we are in the midst of alligator season, and i think the last thing i'd want to be woken up by is the sensation of something nibbling at my toes.)

so, the snacks are packed, as are the hand sanitizer (i had a gnome take an impromptu dip in the swamp the last time i came to the park), first aid kit, bug repellant, and camera**.

now, all i have to do is find alligator repellant.......or figure out if i can outrun SO, if necessary. (surely these thighs are good for something.)

*despite the great tankini controversy of summers past. i'd tell you to remind me to share that story sometime, but quite frankly, i'm still not done being peeved about the whole ordeal.
**yes, folks- i finally recharged my batteries, which means i'll be able to start posting on random photos again soon

9 comments:

Ren said...

Hi. (Yes, yes, yes, I've missed you too... But on to what's important...) It's Saturday. Are you forgetting something?

Q said...

Here's a clue, duff - it starts with 's' and ends with 'entence Saturday'. :P

Osbasso said...

Hey--are you coming to Montana???

Chris said...

"i haven't been out carousing and dancing on tables in ages"

You expect us to believe this?

duff said...

labbie, chuckawucka: i didn't forget. i was actualy testing to see if anyone would notice, since turnout has been so....low lately.

i promise to bring it back next weekend, if you promise to come play.

osbasso: yes, sir- i most certainly am. (sorry i haven't emailed you yet.) i'm flying out in a month, and heading back on the 27th. i'll be down at yellowstone/grand tetons during most of my stay, but might actually have a day or so in helena....trying to be flexible, since i have no idea how long we'll actually be in the parks.

chris: i swear- i've been in a bar twice since college, and not anytime within the past two years. as for table dancing......

jamwall said...

you've got everything except for the wooden stakes and the crucifix for killing vampires.

duff said...

you underestimate me, jamwall. i mean, SO had to be responsible for bringing something, right?

i did, however, forget my cowbell.

Ren said...

How about you e-mail me to remind me that it's sentence saturday?

Or would that just add too much to your plate?

duff said...

i could probably manage that.....but how about getting other folks to play, too?