in a mellow mood

i have this cd ripped into my laptop. it's one of only a few. out of my 1000 or so cds (i've always had a bad cd habit, even before getting into radio. i have my dad to blame for it), only 5 or 6 full albums are loaded onto my computer...the rest of the library consists of a song or two here and there...and maybe one day, when i have more time (and memory on my laptop), i'll add a few more albums. until then, if i want to listen to something in its entirety, my choices are:

headlines and deadlines: the hits of a-ha
from under the cork tree- fall out boy
ready, sex, go- the marvelous 3
the monkees greatest hits
don't tell mom the babysitter's dead soundtrack
the labyrinth soundtrack
sounds of the underground (an 80's alternative/new wave compilation)
about five dr. demento compilations
and this.....sister sweetly, by big head todd and the monsters.

don't know why i felt like sharing such life-changing news with you, but there you go.

this cd (the big head todd one) reminds me of someone from high school. (a boy, naturally. as my close friends from that era can attest, i think i wound up harboring a crush on roughly 10% of the male population of park hill high school at any one time. it's probably just as well that i rarely got dates. i certainly wasn't ready to be on the playing field, let alone rounding many bases....and certainly not with some of my crushes. fortunately, my standards have been raised as i've gotten older. "because he asked me out and wasn't wearing women's clothing at the time" is no longer enough to justify saying "yes". but i digress.....)

anyway, that someone happens to be on myspace.

you know how sometimes you search for random people from your past, just to see if they're on here? (surely i'm not the only one who does it, am i?)

well, one day i typed his name in.

and he's here.

and married.

with a kid.

and i'm reminded of the fact that when i was in kansas city last thanksgiving, i brought back something that belongs to him- a book of peotry and song lyrics that i borrowed from him a mere 12 or so years ago.

i know- oops.

i'm afraid i'm not always the best about returning things i've borrowed. then again, i suppose it sort of evens out, since i've had a few possessions march off into the sunset. (like that inxs poster i stupidly traded my freshman year of high school. i will never stop kicking myself over that.)

anyway, i brought it back to south carolina with me because i figured i could mail it back to him (he's in the kansas city phone book, after all) with a note apologizing for the delay and maybe he'd get curious about what i was up to and send a note back or something.....

yeah, i doubt it too.

isn't it interesting how you can be so totally hung up on someone (for the record, we never so much as dated, kissed.....any of that. not even after i started wearing green because it was (of course) his favorite color...), and not even be a blip on their radar?

(yes, that's just my fancy way of saying that val kilmer still hasn't called.)