Sunday, October 08, 2006

pictures and a couple thousand words (what a bonus!)

i've been playing catch-up today......well, when it comes to the stuff i'm not currently trying to avoid, that is.

(yes, folks, i'm calling the weekly meeting of "procrastinators anonymous" to order.)

first, go check out my handiwork over at random photos. i've spent the last 6 hours tinkering around with it, and i think that, after a month of neglect, i'm finally caught up.

go ahead, i'll wait.

wasn't it all you ever dreamed and more? no? well, i'll have to try a little harder this week, i guess.....cracked lens and all.

yeah- that happened sometime last weekend, judging from my photos. remember those cheap 35 mm cameras that would put waldo or garfield or rainbow brite or whatever on your pictures? well, i now own a more modern, subtle version- it puts a nice streak in the upper left hand corner of every photo i take. i could photoshop it out, but i like imperfections and, as a general rule, i only use photoshop to resize and sometimes crop my photos.

anyway, catching up to myself.....i realized this afternoon that i forgot to recognize a very important anniversary- i left the preschool a year and a week ago. in celebration of this milestone, let me present to you......

five things i do not miss now that i'm no longer at my former place of employment

1. diapers/potty training- i figure i have paid my dues. in the event that i have kids, SO will be handling those areas.....

2. getting 11 out of the twelve kids to sleep.....just before #12 decides to practice their vaudeville routine, which incorporates singing, dancing, gymnastics, and (when told to "cut it out") a rather accurate imitation of a possessed toddler, complete with banshee wail.

3. that one special set of parents in each class that simply refuse to believe that their little angel could hit/kick/bite/spit at/talk back to/smear bodily secretions upon you and/or any of their classmates....who obviously deserved it anyway. (of course, as you're showing them the bite marks their child left on your ankle, the child in question is inevitably trying to perfect their imitation of several looney tunes characters- all at once.)

4. boogers on khakis. (thank goodness that was generally the worst i wound up with.)

5. "i pay $$$$$ a month in tuition, so why are you asking me to bring in wipes/kleenex/a muzzle?" (some folks never seemed to grasp that their tuition checks were not being turned over to me directly. i mean, really, had i been making $600 per month per child, i certainly would be zipping around town in a much fancier vehicle than my current mode of transportation.)

perhaps next year the statute of limitations will have run out and i can share five more with you.....until then, have i mentioned how much i love my current job? we're talking right up there with my love of val kilmer, the haunted mansion ride, and tacos, folks. pretty serious stuff.....

which reminds me- you've this far down the page. why not go a little further and maybe leave a comment or two on the post below?


Callie said...

See - I always believed the preschool teachers about my kids. Because they are the spawn of Satan, and I realize this, and know all the hazards that come with raising demons. In fact, it's usually ME warning other people about my children.


Sorry about your camera. My 35mm developed one of those right before I bought my digital. Made the pictures interesting, what with the orangish/white streak going through most of the photos. Sort of reminded me of the Omen.

*evil laugh*

duff said...

i wondered if anyone was actually going to comment on this one.

when i left the preschool, several people asked if i'd seek out the same type of job elsewhere. i tried very hard not to laugh in their faces. i'm afraid five years of raising other people's children was quite enough.

doesn't anyone raise their own children anymore? i mean, there were kids who would show up when the doors opened at 7, and wouldn't leave until 6pm. why bother having kids if the only time you spend with them is in the car, in the drive through (redundant, i know), and when you throw them in bed half an hour after getting home?

actually, let me take back that last part- most parents i ran into let their kids stay up obscenely 9pm, which was my bedtime my freshman year of high school.