Friday, August 04, 2006

so much to write about, so little time......


i didn't hide out at the haunted mansion so i could take up residence with the "999 happy haunts" (all together now: "but there's room for a thousand"*)

i've been back from the happiest place on earth since tuesday night, but i've been so busy catching up with myself that this is the first time i've logged onto blogger since my return.

sorry to keep my two readers hanging. my bad.

(for the record, i'll try to finish off the dizz knee land series this weekend, but i'm going to backdate the entries, so feel free to scroll down and see if i've gotten caught up yet.)

topics other than disneyworld have my attention this evening, however.

first order of business:

what have you folks been drinking lately? i just opened up statcounter, and it seems i'm the go-to girl when it comes to duff cakes baltimore, "which of the seven dwarves is last alphabetically?" (sneezy, isn't it?), sesame street terror alert myspace, lyrics of bryan adams' "please forgive me" (the spelling/grammar was just too much- i had to adjust it), how to make a pinuta (no really- that's how it was spelled), virtual map prince edward island - crapaud, and i'm number one for "random place in morocco". (i assume my certificate is in the mail.)

people also recently visited in search of the phone number for my radio station (that'd be (803) 978-1047, for you folks playing along at home), "puncture wound sexy foot" (thank goodness that foot wasn't mine, for once. then again, while my feet are rather cute, i'm not sure they can be considered "sexy" if i still haven't learned how to walk in heels yet.)....and while we're at it, i am honored (no, not really) to report that the amanda peet and hilary duff foot fetishists are alive and well. on a more aromatic note, someone in france searched for "mini caramellos", which reminds me- i still have an unopened bag of hershey's caramel kisses at home......for right after my high school reunion, since between now and then i need to lose the weight i gained during multiple trips to multiple buffets down in disneyworld.

finally, i've saved the best for last. i'm not quite sure how it led to me, but somehow, someone in czechoslovakia wound up here after googling "miss kendra" girdle.

in an odd sort of way, that leads me into my

second order of business:

i'm not quite sure how these things happen to me, but somehow i've managed to get myself into not one, not two, but three different conversations about underwear in the past two days. (i swear i don't normally talk about underwear, at least not a majority of the time, but i am afraid it is slightly more interesting a topic than most of the mindless drivel i constantly babble about.)

so, i figured, why not make it a fourth time? since you probably haven't had a conversation about underwear lately, i figure i might as well include you in this one. (after all, that's what the comments section is for, isn't it? unless of course, you are a proud tidy-whitey wearer, in which case, feel free to keep that little tidbit to yourself.)

recent topics for discussion:

1. "i need underwear. go upstairs and get me some." which i replied, "i have underwear on. you're the one who needs it, so you should be the one to get it. everyone gets their own underwear around here."

2. "commando?"

most nearly-five-year-olds know what that means, right? right? ok, fine. maybe my sidekick is now ahead of the she should be.

3. "tidy whities? noooooooooooo"

am i the only one who feels the need to convert my significant others' choices in underwear? i'm trying to scroll through my current instant messenger conversation to see how eloquently i phrased it.....

ah, yes- here it is:

"i will not get naked with anyone wearing tidy whities.
in fact, seeing them only makes me want to put more clothes on...including running shoes, so i can scamper away very quickly....."


*for the record, i only went through four times this time. i know, i know- i'm slipping.


Callie said...

Glad you're back! Totally jealous of your trip, though. Living vicariously through you, so go out and have more fun.

Oh, and I'm so with you on the tidy whities. There is just something so boring about them. I buy hubby the boxer/briefs in all kinds of snazzy colors. He looks so good in them.

Hmmm . . . think I need to go molest him now . . .

Martha said...

Are tighty whities Y-fronts?

duff said...

callie: soon, very soon. i've got the big reunion in two weeks, and then i'll be in arizona (with a hike at zion national park in utah) at the end of the month.

too bad my credit card is still smoking from my last trip.

martha: yes, martha, they are.....and they're heinous and must be stopped at all costs.

Kal said...

Haven't worn tighty-whities since high school. Went for the boxers, but have recently discovered the "boxer-brief".

Give you all the necessary.. umm... support/confinement of the TW (so nothinng ends up where it shouldn't during sports, for example), but with ultimately more panache.

And Commando? Once. Felt so entirely dirty I could never, ever, do it again.

Callie said...

But commando is so comfy. And makes things so easily accessable.

Stef said...

"how to make a pinuta"?

Is that supposed to be "pinata"? I'm not even sure I spelled it right!

Motherdear said...

Okay. Here's where my age shows...

1. Thought it was "tighty-whities". I really did!

2. What's a Commando, and why does Kal know what a Commando is? I didn't raise you to know about kinky underwear, dude! If that is what a Commando is...

3. And no, I'm not googling Commando. Just in case it puts me on some x-rated mailing list!!

4. What have I been drinking??? Pinutas!!! (Now we'll have to invent a drink recipe for Pinutas and make it the official drink of duffland!) I'd like to suggest something peachy, but I'll leave it to the mixmasters out there.