Friday, June 29, 2007

"if you wanna be my lover......

....you gotta get with my friends".

i'm still trying to figure out the logic behind that. then again, i wouldn't doubt it if one of the other four spice girls harbored at least a minor crush on david beckham, posh'd husband. i mean, quite frankly, is there a woman alive who would turn that down?

(before i hear from a certain member of the peanut gallery, let me rephrase: is there a straight woman alive.....)

i returned from my vacation earlier this week (details to follow over the weekend- i need to crop my visual aids and get the last couple of days recorded on paper, first) and upon opening my inbox to tackle an avalanche of missives from financially inept nigerians and underground pill pushers, as well as a few messages from actual friends, i was immediately confronted with gossip that was about as believable as hearing that michael "thriller" jackson and joe "steppin' out" jackson were related*.

today it was confirmed (because, obviously, everything that appears in the entertainment section of the local newspaper must be true, right?)- the spice girls are heading out on tour again.

the reporter behing the blurb i read in today's paper seemed disappointed that the girls didn't dress their parts for their recent press conference confirming the tour. i'm curious as to how they'll pull it off on the tour itself. i mean, "scary" melanie b. no longer looks very intimidating (though i'm sure there's some sort of reason why eddie murphy bolted), and i'm not quite sure how "baby" emma bunton is going to pull off her role- or maybe her nickname will just take on a whole new meaning, in seeing as how she's expecting. (this'll be child number six, after posh's three, scary's one, and ginger's little girl.)

and speaking of "ginger" geri hallowell- does anyone else remember her pre-ginger days, when she was "sexy" spice? i can't remember whether that was changed before or after her photos (pre-spice girls, it should be noted) were printed in playboy. she left the group to pursue a solo career (remember "look at me"? i should chase her album down on amazon- my ipod could use a little freshening up- a week in a car and the music starts to get a little stale), followed by a goodwill ambassadorship...or something like that....

...but can she support bluebell madonna** on that sort of salary?

not that i'm saying that's the reason they're touring. i mean, to an extent, it fits in nicely with the other reunion tours this summer- the police (excellent concert, by the way), genesis.......

...wait a minute- is anyone else seeing a pattern here?

*don't laugh. when i was about six, i had not yet grasped how common a last name like "jackson" really was. i was convinced the two were brothers. after all, i'd heard that michael was from a musical family....

**i'm guessing she took a page from the bob geldof/paula yates/michael hutchence guide to baby names

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