Sunday, June 29, 2008

in which i practically dare you to make snide "mosquito bites" comments

it has recently come to my attention that i'm overdue for a post again.

(not that anyone actually pointed it out, mind you. i found myself looking for stuff to do instead of doing the stuff i need to do, and somewhere between virtual sightseeing in alaska and obsessively checking my msn messenger to see if it was still working (consider it the modern day version of picking the phone up every half hour while expecting a call....you know- just to make sure everything's working properly), i realized that i had yet to replace my post about my hot date with mr. clean with something a little less...well....lame.)

i would be remiss if i didn't acknowledge the passing of george carlin earlier this week. unlike my sibling, i was actually fortunate enough to see him perform live- twice. he came to my college back in 1997 (or was it '98?) on one tour (i took mama), and i saw him again a few years ago, when he came through columbia on another college tour. SO and i talked about trying to catch him in vegas at some point, but i'm afraid we missed his last show.

of all of his bits, probably his most famous was the "seven words you can't say on television". i've come to the conclusion that they're a lot like the seven dwarves- everyone can remember some of them, but very few people can rattle all of them off on command (and not just because they're out of quarters to put into the "swear can").

for the record, i always seem to try and substitute some version of "@!&*" (either by itself, or as half a word) in place of the one carlin dwelled on the longest. one might wonder if i'd have such a problem were i hauling around double-ds. however, i'm fairly certain were that the case, i'd have more of a problem not walking like the hunchback of notre dame.

and on that note, it's been at least twenty minutes since i checked both the mosquito forecast for denali national park and whether or not my computer's signed me out of messenger without my knowledge.....

8 comments:

rowena said...

As it stands, the italian mosquitos have accepted me into their 'hood. Oh they still bite alright, but it's not as nasty as before. Of course the scenario will be turned around when I go back home (Hawaii) to visit. I can just hear them buzzing ...."Ooooh, her blood reeks of pasta, cheese and wine. Yum!"

Thanks for bringing the apps...I ♥ stuffed mushrooms!

mr_g said...

I can say 'em all! I used to know the whole routine. When I was a kid, I had a Carlin album I played into the ground...low enough so Mom wouldn't hear what I was listening to and take it like my Son of Schmilson record - with the classic f-bomb laden, 'You're Breaking My Heart'. (And I'm explaining this to someone who has as much if not more useless music trivia stored away than me...sorry ;-) )

Callie said...

Had to delete my first comment due to numerous spelling errors.

What I was trying to say is:

Yes, I too can rattle them off the top of my head. What I like to do is string them all together into one holy mother of a swear.

He was my favorite all time comedian (closely followed by Jeff Dunham).

Oh, and I finally deleted MSN Messenger off our computer. It was too depressing.

Ren said...

If you get malaria or dengue, both passed by mosquitoes, in Maryland, you get to have a phone conversation with me... I'm in charge of controlling both diseases here.

just some dude said...

If no one else will, I'll say that you have fine uhm, uhhh, mosquito bites. ;-)

Larry said...

ooooooh! i think that deserves some nervous applause. some dude is brave. although to be fair, you did practically dare him.

Bite Me said...

Ok, she did practically dare him and he did say they were fine, so I guess it was ok. ;-)

duff said...

rowena: hawaii? which island?

g: "son of schmilson"? you've stumped me, though i hate to admit it.

callie: i like dunham, too. have you run into tommy tiernan yet? i caught his special on tv while i was in hawaii....very funny.

ren: thankfully, i have no reason to regret not putting your number into my speed-dial before my trip.

dude, larry, and bite me: i let you/him get away with it...just this once ;~)